health

'5 months after my partner's cancer surgery, we breathed a sigh of relief. Then I found a lump.'

What would you do if you knew your time was running out?

In 2021, cancer caught up to me. Five months after my partner Lory had successful prostate cancer surgery, I found a lump.

It was stage four breast cancer, and my doctor informed me that it was terminal. The next few weeks were a total blur. I learned the cancer had spread. Then I was being whisked into surgery, and what followed was multiple chemotherapy rounds.

Losing my hair was horrible — a feeling that as a woman I can't quite describe. But what started as an emotional moment turned into a joyous one.

Watch: one woman shares her cancer story. Post continues below.


Cancer Chicks.

I arrived home to find my son and his friends with freshly shaved heads.

I felt such love and support in that moment. In their simple act, it became "Right, we're in the fight now."

Some people with stage four cancer live longer than the expected timeframe of three to five years, and some people live shorter than that.

I hope to be someone who lives beyond 1700 days, but as I'm in my third year post-diagnosis, I recognise that my life is highly likely to be much shorter than my husband and that I'll pass away before my son gets married and has kids. 

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Growing up, my parents always said that the biggest gift you can give is your time.

When I had my own child, volunteering for school activities like tuck shop, reading groups and sports became a regular occurrence — all while I was building a thriving career in the IT industry.

When you give something to other people – whether it's time, skills, money or even a small act of kindness — it's good for your mind, for your heart and for your spirit. It's like throwing a stone in water, which ripples beyond you, and it's far more interesting than talking about death and cancer. Trust me.

Today, I'm choosing to see my cancer as a gift — a gift of purpose — and it helps me think about how I can help others. It's driven me to raise awareness about early detection, cancer screenings, and annual mammograms.

It's now about relishing in the joy of giving back.

In finding the purpose in cancer, and the joy in giving, I can keep 'the cancer bogeyman' in the cupboard and not let it escape, not into my world or into my family. Instead, I use my voice to continue to advocate for women in leadership, but I also speak up for women's health and raise awareness of breast cancer.

It's knowing now that my timeline is short that I feel an urgent need to make as much impact as I can, while I can.

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I've become a patient advocate for cancer awareness with the Olivia Newton-John Wellness Centre and Breast Cancer Network Australia. I am also a supporter of the She Gives campaign, a national effort to help grow the culture of giving at a time of significant need by sharing and celebrating 100 stories of giving.

By sharing my story, I hope to inspire others to find the joy in giving — whether it's a simple act like my son shaving his head or championing a cause.

Now having the same cancer that Olivia Newton-John had, I understand exactly what she intended to do by founding the Olivia Newton-John Cancer Wellness and Research Centre in Melbourne. Because though my life may be shortened, I am living it fully. I walk daily, practice Pilates, and do resistance training. I've lost weight and no longer drink alcohol or eat red meat or much processed foods.

If there is a message that I want people to know, it's this — it's amazing what finding purpose and what giving to others can do.

I'm on an accelerated timeline to make every day count, and I don't want to spend all my time focusing only on my health. I need to think about the impact that I can have and how every day can be as joyful possible.

In the end, it all makes a difference to someone. It certainly has for me.

Feature Image: Supplied.

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