entertainment

FLUFF: Tabloids say Angelina Jolie is pregnant so it must be true.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Professional gossips around the world are freaking out about “news” that 38-year-old actress/goddess Angelina Jolie is pregnant.

Our only evidence comes from a “source” who is “close” to Angie and Brad. That “source” “says” that Angie is 2 months along and is calling this one her “miracle baby”.

Without confirmation from the King and Queen of Attractive themselves, we’re treating this as pure (kind of delightful) speculation for now. Even if Star magazine (what even is that?) is “reporting” that Angie and Brad “feel so blessed”.

So let’s run this as a Choose Your Own Truth post. Here are your options.

1. Angelina Jolie really is pregnant, this will be her 7th child and she’s using the eggs she froze last year in prep for a bigger family. Yay, congratulations, baby news, etc etc.

OR

2. Angie had a big breakfast one morning, got snapped by paparazzi and tabloid magazines around the world gleefully sprung on a tiny breakfast bump as proof of pregnancy.

OR

3. Gossip mags have finally grown tired of pretending Jennifer Anniston is pregnant, so they’ve launched Operation Jolie, a campaign of ever-so-slightly plumper Angie photos to sell magazines.

Angelina and Brad already have six kids – Maddox, 12, Pax, 10, Zahara, 8, Shiloh, 7, and twins Vivienne and Knox, 5.

Here’s proof of their excessively handsome relationship:

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