This post discusses mental health and could be triggering for some readers.
I will never forget that day just before Easter in 2019.
I left the house with my two children and braced myself for the normal separation anxiety that my daughter experiences at daycare drop off. She screams hysterically every single time I leave her and although I know she will be okay once I go, I always leave with a heavy feeling in my heart.
My son is generally happy to go to school, but on this day he would not leave my side. His eyes welled up with tears as the school educators peeled him off me so I could leave. I could hear him screaming as I quickly walked back to my car.
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The drop off at daycare went as expected. The usual clinginess and hysterical screams occurred.
But this time I didn't walk away with just a heavy heart. I felt something break.
Back in my car, my children’s screams haunted me, and I couldn't stop the tears rolling down my cheeks. I cried the whole 20-minute car ride to work.
When I arrived, I tried so hard to calm down, to compose myself, but the first person who saw me asked if I was okay, and I broke.
What was going on? Everyone kept asking what was wrong, and I had no answer. I didn't know; I just felt so incredibly sad.
That afternoon my boss suggested I see my GP. I took her advice. I booked two weeks of leave and made an appointment.