entertainment

What we think we know about Kim and Kanye's wedding. Maybe.

 

Kim Kardashian and Kanye West are getting married this weekend, causing entertainment journalists across the world to attach a twelve horse power engine to the rumour mill and see how fast it can go.

Kim and Kanye aren’t letting out any of the details (presumably because there’s a big magazine/television deal in the pipeline), but there are a more than enough rumours floating around to satisfy even the most Kardashian-krazy kid’s thirst for knowledge. Here are our top six:

1. The King and Kween are not being wed at Versailles.

Of all of the rumours, this one appears to be the most concrete.

Despite the wedding party currently being based at Versailles, and early rumours that this will be where the couple will walk down the aisle, the people in charge of events at the iconic former residence of Marie Antoinette and Louis XVI have denied that further wedding celebrations will take place there. They said in a statement: “Kim Kardashian and Kanye West have decided to visit the Chateau of Versailles with their guests in a private surprise tour organised for Friday, May 23rd, on the eve of their marriage.”

Here’s a casual shot of what could have been from Kim’s Instagram:

It’s okay, Kimmy. We’re sure the Forte di Belvedere in Florence (where the wedding is rumoured to actually be taking place) is just as nice:

Eh.

2. They will have 3,000 guests in attendance.

Can we all just think about trying to draw up that seating plan? *Shudder*

3. They have just had an engagement party/rehearsal dinner.

This is where our facts start to become a little bit shaky. KK, K-dubz and a bunch of their many guests were at Versailles on Friday (their time) for some sort of event. E! Online are calling this their “pre-wedding dinner celebration”, Hollywood Life is calling it a “wedding rehearsal dinner” and the Daily Mail believe this was just the start of one big wedding weekend.

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It’s hard to tell what happened in the Hall of Mirrors that night, because the celebration was top secret.

Lol jks, this Instagram user took pictures of the whole thing.

Here’s Lana Del Rey giving a performance:

And here are some Kardashians with Lana (note Kim’s Martin Margiela plunge neckline white suit/dress/body covering, so bridal):

4. Kim is being kept away from her phone and the internet to make sure that the wedding is a ‘surprise’.

Kanye has allegedly taken care of most of the wedding preparations, kind of like the grooms that really short-lived Aussie reality television show, Don’t Tell the Bride, but with roughly 278530 times the amount of money in his wallet. Part of executing this clever plan has involved keeping Kim away from the outside world.

Kanye, see the Instagram pic in #1. It was taken yesterday. Up your game.

5. Italy’s sending in the troops to provide security for the wedding.

This is a totally great allocation of state resources. We can’t think of any sort of legitimate conflicts in Europe which could benefit from military forces from EU countries right now. Nup, not one.

6. Jay-Z will be Kanye’s best man.

Cool, cool. Jay-Z, Kanye, best man…

Did someone say BEYONCE IN ATTENDANCE?! Please, for the love of everything Kardashian-Knowles, let her be filmed doing the Single Ladies dance on the dance floor. Please.

Be honest: are you a little bit excited about the Kim and Kanye wedding?