My Nana used to say that parenting is ‘very leveling’, meaning that once you’ve had kids the big differences that separate families become irrelevant. You’re all in the same boat. She became a mother in an era where children were seen and not heard, laundry took an entire day and hot meals were expected on the table morning noon and night.
Motherhood has evolved considerably since those days. Typically, fathers are more hands-on. Technology has sprung forward, delivering quick solutions to all our household needs. And when it comes to our offspring, we’re more child-centric than ever before.
So is parenting still ‘very levelling’? Not from where I’m standing. In fact, sometimes it seems like the opposite is true and we’ve all become rather judgemental. What I am struggling with the most is the speed at which we are willing to condemn one another as ‘bad mothers’.
“Just witnessed a really upsetting scene in a shopping centre,” a friend announced on Facebook. “Poor toddler lay screaming on the floor while his mother shouted at him.”
The comments came thick and fast. Awful woman. Poor child. Some people don’t deserve to be parents.
I know these women. They are kind and compassionate. We are friends… Would they condemn me so quickly?
Top Comments
I don't know...I absolutely take the point, but to be fair, if your friend was really distressed by what she saw first hand in the supermarket, perhaps this wasn't a run of the mill situation. I'd give her the benefit of the doubt rather than assume she was being judgemental. Yeah, most of us are doing the best we can for our kids, but some people genuinely are awful to theirs and should be called on it.
Very well said - what most mums think.