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Dear world. Kate Middleton isn't pregnant, she's just on maternity leave.

Is Kate Middleton expecting a baby? 

This week the press has been awash with headlines about everybody’s fave chocolate brunette, the Duchess of Cambridge. 

She didn’t go to her friend’s wedding!

She hasn’t been seen in public in a month!

WHERE IS KATE?!?!

Guys, relax. I'm right here. Image: Getty.

Of course the gossip mags can only point to one conclusion; the Duchess is up the duff.

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Multiple tabloids around the world are speculating that the reason we haven’t seen Kate stepping out to thrill us all in a pair of every-woman skinny jeans and her newest so-chic-it-makes-us-sick espadrilles is that she is expecting royal progeny 3.0.

A ‘reliable source’ has leaked to the press that Kate is already expecting baby number three. If this is true, then she will become mother to ‘Irish Twins’ in March or April. This phenomenon is more commonly described as “I didn’t think I could fall pregnant again so soon after giving birth, yes I am freaking out about having two children under the age of one, thanks for asking.”

So, is the Duchess really gestating another heir so soon?

Let's not mention that Kate attended a function for the America's Cup World Series just a few weeks ago. image via getty
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Let’s all just chill for a minute shall we? To answer the question of Kate’s whereabouts once and for all - she’s at home. With her two small children.

It’s called maternity leave, people!

Baby Charlotte is just four months old. It’s no wonder Kate has been out of sight. It has been widely reported that she is a very hands on Mum, accepting minimal help from outsiders as she prefers to take care of her new baby and big brother George on her own terms.

As Kate has probably figured out by now, being a stay at home Mum to two kids under three while hubby goes out to work is freaking difficult. Behind closed mansion doors, she’s probably got those ravishing chocolate tresses scrunched up in a bun because they haven’t had a shampoo in days. She’ll be constantly sporting a parenting badge of honour in the form of a vomit stain on her designer shirt.

Remember this little guy? Yeah, he probably takes some looking after. Image: Getty.
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No doubt Kate has her hands completely full with a toddler whose main interest is crumbling the contents of a royal box of Weeties all over a 19th century floor rug and a baby who is likely still waking every three to fours hours during the night. If she ever does manage to get the planets to align and have them both asleep at the same time, slipping into an evening gown and heading out on the town is probably the last thing on her mind. Just like the rest of us, Kate is more likely to be gravitating towards a cup of tea, some Terry’s Chocolate Orange and the Real Housewives of Essex during her downtime.

Let’s also take into account that this mother of two is in the unique situation of being hounded by cameras every time she steps out the door. Imagine the reality of the mere fact that you dared to go outside ‘looking tired’ making world news. Not to mention that photos of your precious children from any distance are worth their weight in gold three times over.

Everyone take a breather. She's taking care of these two. Image: Getty.
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With two tiny tots and the constant threat of the paparazzi, it’s no wonder Kate has made the choice to lay low and enjoy her maternity leave while she has the chance.

Even with all the help in the world, there are not many mothers who would be planning the arrival of baby number three so soon after having their second. Let’s all back off and give Kate the time that every mother deserves before she has to step out into the world again as a working mum.

TAP THE IMAGE to see the Duchess' year in pictures.