real life

‘My wife was rushed to hospital with our unborn baby. Then the unthinkable happened.'

Content warning: This post includes discussion of pregnancy loss that may be distressing to some readers. 

Earlier this year, Ben Thompson and his pregnant wife Lauren experienced one of those moments that makes you truly appreciate everything you have.

Sitting beside their four boys, aged between nine and two, they were enjoying the crocodile show at Queensland’s Australia Zoo when a flock of colourful birds flew over the top of them.

Image: Supplied.

"Lauren told me later that night that when the birds went past, she started tearing up and had this overwhelming gratitude for our life," Ben told Mamamia

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"I had the exact same feeling at the time. It was like our souls both knew what was about to happen."

Just a week later, their idyllic family life was irrevocably shattered when – at 36 weeks gestation – Lauren suffered a horrific obstetric complication which resulted in her death and the loss of their baby girl.

'She made being a mum look easy'

The beloved teacher who "did everything with grace and made being a mum look easy" had enjoyed a problem-free pregnancy with her fifth child.

But on March 31, the 38-year-old had just eaten an ice-cream and was heading to bed when she started having stomach pains. 

"She never eats ice-cream, so we attributed the stomach pain to that, but then things got worse from there," Ben said. 

Assuming she was going into labour, Lauren asked Ben to call family members to come and stay with their boys.

But within minutes, she had suffered excessive bleeding and collapsed before being rushed to hospital via ambulance. 

It turned out Lauren had suffered a catastrophic bleed as the result of placenta accreta – a condition where the placenta grows too deep into the uterine wall and can cause the uterus to rupture.

Watch: What is Placenta Accreta? Post continues below.


Video via University health.
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There is an increased risk for women who have had caesareans due to scar tissue - Lauren had four.

At hospital, a team of medical specialists worked desperately to save Lauren and deliver her baby - before Ben heard the worst news imaginable.

'The boys told their mum they loved her'

"The head doctor came and said to me they had both passed. I collapsed and was bawling my eyes out on the floor. I wasn’t allowed in... then five minutes later, he said Lauren’s heart had started beating again," Ben said. 

"In his 26 years he’d only seen it one other time. To me, that’s a full-on miracle."

While his wife continued to fight in a critical condition, Ben got to hold his baby girl. 

"She looked exactly like my son, Liam," Ben shared. 

"We didn’t know the gender, so we hadn’t decided on a name. Lauren wanted Emily, I wanted Sophie. 

"Then the name Hannah came to my mind. I checked Lauren’s notes app, because she was always so organised and she had a list called T5 Baby Names that I’d never seen before. And right there at the top was Hannah Michelle Thompson."

For the next seven days, Ben faced the unimaginable task of bringing his boys to see their mum while mourning the loss of their daughter. 

"They told their mum they loved her, but the younger ones didn’t understand," Ben said. 

"Most of that week, I was telling Lauren to fight and stay with us, talking to her about Hannah and saying she was safe and we would both be with her again and the end of our lives."

But on April 7, Lauren lost her battle. 

Now Ben is having to navigate his own grief while caring for his four sons.

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“It still hasn’t set in, I don’t want it to set in,” he said.

“Kids grieve way differently than we do in a lot of ways. We’ll be talking about (their) mum for a little bit and then they’re playing again two seconds later.

“It’s difficult for me to understand because I’ll be grieving constantly and can’t flick that switch like kids can.”

Placenta accreta

After organising the funeral for his beloved wife and baby Hannah, Ben said he wanted to share his wife’s story so more people are aware about placenta accreta. 

While described as “rare”, it occurs in around 1 in 300 pregnancies, according to a NSW Health fact sheet

This figure used to be closer to 1 in 1000 in the 1970s, but caesareans are now more common. 

“I keep thinking, what good can possibly come from this? I just want women to be aware and ask questions.”

When contacted by Mamamia, a hospital spokesperson declined to comment on “individual patient matters due to privacy and confidentiality”.

Ben’s family and friends have set up a GoFundMe to support them as they navigate life without Lauren and Hannah. You can contribute here.

If this has raised any issues for you or if you would like to speak with someone, please contact the Sands Australia 24-hour support line on 1300 072 637. 

You can download Never Forgotten: Stories of love, loss and healing after miscarriage, stillbirth, and neonatal death for free here.

Feature Image: Supplied.