entertainment

Inside the ridiculous, over-the-top, horrifying Oscars gift bags.

Don’t feel sorry for all the losers at this year’s Oscars. They’re walking away with $80,000-100,000 worth of ridiculous presents.

The Oscars are one of the most lavish ceremonies in celebrity-land, so it’s no surprise the gift bags for nominees top anything us mere mortals could even dream of. But we’re still pretty flabbergasted at the contents of these take away packs and just how much a piece of furniture could cost.

The gift bags, worth between $80,000 and $125,000, are filled with all sorts of things only a celebrity who has absolutely everything could appreciate… like a vibrator, a voucher to get your own blood injected into your vagina and a horoscope reading. Seriously, you just can’t make this shit up.

The bags are compiled annually  by LA-based marketing company Distinctive Asset and will be given to everyone nominated for Best Actor, Best Actress, Best Supporting Actor, Best Supporting Actress and Best Director who doesn’t win. It’s the most fancy consolation prize we’ve ever heard of.

We’re not sure what a male-dominated awards show will do with the vagina blood transplant, but they’re all creative people so we bet they’ll think of something.

Here’s the full list of the absolutely ridiculous consolation prizes.

  • $20,000 worth of car rentals.
  • A three-night stay a Tuscany villa, worth $1,500.
  • An $800 voucher for a candy buffet.
  • A $250 vibrator from Afterglow that uses laser therapy to increase arousal.
  • A $5,000 O-Shot. Where your own blood is injected into your vagina. Apparently it’s good for sexual response areas.
  • A $20,000 gift certificate for dream analysis, a horoscope reading and a lesson in mind control.
  • A $5,060 Home Spa System.
  • 10 personal training sessions.
  • A liposuction treatment worth $4,000.
  • A $12,500 voucher for Terravelo Tours – combining outdoor adventure sports with gourmet food.
  • A $5,000 piece of art.
  • A $25,000 piece of furniture by Elena Foccoli.
  • A $10,000 donation of pet food to the celebrity’s animal shelter of choice.
  • A $14,239 package from Reset Yourself that will include a hair mineral analysis, nutritional supplements and a session with a meditation expert.
  • A $229 automatic wearable 5 megapixel camera from Narrative Clip.

What would you dream ‘prizes’ be if you were a celeb?