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Kim volunteers at a local shelter for women in need. These are the stories she can't forget.

Content warning: This story includes descriptions of domestic violence that may be distressing to some readers.

The Northern Beaches Women's Shelter (NBWS) they help rebuild hundreds of lives a year. And one of the women who helps run the ship is volunteer and donations coordinator Kim Baesanu.

She initially started at the shelter as a volunteer over a year ago, after hearing about the work they do from her local mother's group

"During COVID, a bunch of us mums were preparing meals and gathering donations for the shelter on a weekly basis. After getting to know the team at the shelter, they asked me if I’d like to take on a more active role and since then I have considered it a privilege to work among these inspiring women," Kim explained. 

No two days are the same for Kim and her team of more than 20 volunteers - it can range from organising donations, responding to emails and phone calls, keeping stock of what goods are in storage for the women to have, and even moving residents out to their new home and the future that awaits.

"It is largely because of them that we are able to continue to provide a comfortable and welcoming home for the women who seek our help and support," Kim said. "Much of what we do for the residents is volunteer-run, whether that be our the wellbeing programs, the gardening group, sewing club, cooking classes and or empowerment circles."

On the day that I speak with Kim, she's just helped move one of the women into her own apartment. And for Kim, it always feels like a full circle moment to see a woman in need back on her feet. 

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"It's a really beautiful time. We are there to support them during this very significant transition in their life. We help move their belongings and set up their new home as they build a new life for themselves," Kim said.

Recently we helped a very sweet woman who had fallen on difficult times and had been living at the shelter for a good period of time. When she first arrived, all she had was a small bag of necessities and the clothes she was wearing. To now see her confidence and independence blossom with a stable job and the ability to pay rent on an apartment of her own - it's very special."

Kim and the team helping move residents into their new homes, and raising money for the shelter. Image: Supplied.

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There's another woman that sticks in Kim's mind.

In her 40s, *Priya had been a victim of financial abuse in her relationship, and fled with little to her name. The shelter was able to provide refuge for Priya - giving her a place to rebuild her confidence and financial security. 

"She came here with very little and didn't have a job. English was her second language so communication was also a challenge for her. She stayed with the shelter for six months, and one of our volunteers who also happens to be a teacher, helped the woman develop her English," Kim said to Mamamia.

While at the shelter, Priya managed to secure a part-time job, which enabled her to get a unit in her name - something she had never done before. It was a small space, but it was all hers. And the pride she must have felt in knowing what an achievement that was, radiated on her face, Kim said.

Another resident, *Sheryl, had also fled an abusive environment when she came to NBWS.

When she arrived, Kim said Sheryl was a shell of herself - struggling after all she had endured. But she found comfort in spending time at the shelter's garden. 

"This resident in particular just adored the garden. She started giving us guidance on how to tend to the veggie patch, grow our own produce and use it in cooking. It was beautiful to see, and it meant a lot to her to give back to the shelter."

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Kirstie Christensen is the Fundraising and Communications Manager for NBWS. In her time with the shelter, she says there are a multitude of reasons why a woman may present to the shelter for help.

"They're often multi-layered cases. 40 per cent are associated with domestic or family violence, and then mental health challenges is 30 per cent. Drug and alcohol is 10 per cent, and lastly we have financial and immigration matters at 20 per cent. DV is the most common foundational reason though," Kirstie explained to Mamamia

As for the age range, the majority of residents are women over 40. It's a sobering reality considering that women over 55 are the biggest growing cohort of homelessness in Australia.

Watch women and violence: the hidden numbers. Post continues below.


Video via Mamamia.

There are some shelters across Australia that do house the children of women fleeing violence as well, however NBWS is unequipped facilities-wise to take on kids. But Kirstie said that often adult kids will visit the shelter to see their mums, which is always special to see. 

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Christmas in particular is a bittersweet time for many of the residents.

"It's a busy time of year for the shelter, as domestic violence cases often spike. With this in mind, we try and organise uplifting activities for the residents. We have a party, the women get to decorate the space, we sing carols, do craft. And each of the residents get their own personalised gift as well," Kirstie said.

"Given that a lot of the women at the shelter are in their 40s and older, their kids are mostly teens or adults. We just try to make sure the residents know their kids are always welcome to visit them and have those moments together."

And volunteer coordinator Kim says that's what Christmas time at the shelter teaches her - to cherish the happy, safe moments with those you love.

Kim herself has lived in the Northern Beaches for a number of years, and seeing the community come together for those in need has had a big impact on her life. Kim's four kids - ranging in age from seven to 14 - also love to get involved.

"My two oldest ones are in high school and they will often help sort through donations and help with deliveries. Their schools even get behind them by holding fundraisers and we have a lot of the Dads and husbands in the community also helping out. Everyone is very proud of the work they do and it definitely enriches the community we live in."

Because for the volunteers at Northern Beaches Women's Shelter, it's a makeshift family, and they rely on each other for support and compassion too.

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Kim in the centre with her fellow volunteers. Image: Supplied.

"The work that we do, the stories we hear, and the women we help - a lot of that we can't share with our own loved ones for confidentiality reasons. So our volunteer team, who range in age from 40 to 60, is a tight-knit family where we can draw on each other for support and guidance during the challenging times," Kim said.

"Often when I tell people the work that I do, they say 'oh that must be really depressing'. And look, it's definitely hard and it can be heavy. But to see the phenomenal stories of success, triumph and empowerment - it means so much. I genuinely love the work I do at the shelter because I am working within a team that is creating a lasting and meaningful impact in these women's lives."

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Ultimately, Kirstie and Kim wish they could be doing more. Because their shelter has to turn away an average of 13 women every month as they don't have capacity to house them.

As Kirstie said: "The fact we have to do that to over 135 women a year is horrendous. So clearly, there's a need for our service, sadly. I always say that domestic violence is not dictated by postcode. And following on from the pandemic, we've seen a substantial increase in women needing our service."

But the amazing thing is that the caseworkers at NBWS walk side by side with the residents until they're ready to walk on their own. They are saving women's lives and helping them rebuild - and that's certainly something to celebrate. 

If you would like to donate to Northern Beaches Women's Shelter, you can do so here. If you would like to get involved, you can read more about it here.

If this has raised any issues for you, or if you just feel like you need to speak to someone, please call 1800 RESPECT (1800 737 732) – the national sexual assault, domestic and family violence counselling service. 

*Names of the former residents have been changed for privacy reasons.

Feature Image: Supplied.

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