Mamamia recaps FBoy Island: The FBoys begin their redemption arc... And it's working.

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FBoy Island has haunted me for the past week.

I'd be going about my life – doing the dishes, ordering a coffee, doom-scrolling before bed – and the thought would appear, for the 2000th time: "God, I can't wait to find out who the FBoys are."

It was a cliffhanger for the ages.

AND GOD I AM EXCITED ABOUT THIS EPISODE.

We launch straight into it, because Caleb has already s**t his pants in anticipation of being outed as a FBoy.

It's especially funny because darling, we knew.

Ziara yells at him and it is wonderful.

In a piece to camera, he recounts getting absolutely scorched – and shoutout to the post-production team, because the smoke coming off him as he talks about having "charcoal marks on [his] arsehole" is pure TV magic.

Justin is next and HE IS A NICE GUY????

I am genuinely shook.

Turns out the Draco Malfoy hairstyle duped ALL OF US.

I am relieved to learn that Izaya is a Nice Guy, and Benny is ALSO a Nice Guy, bruv.

Thirty-something-year-old Cory reveals himself as a Nice Guy too and this one also shook me. OKAY, THEN WHAT IS YOUR REAL AGE, NICE GUY CORY?

Sean is an FBoy, who enjoys taking pretty women down a peg.

Quickly:

• Ben = FBoy, with absolutely NO business being an FBoy.
• Josh = Nice Guy.
• Clay = FBoy who wants you to follow him on Instagram (so you can see his work and also the pics of his secret girlfriend!).

Finally, Joshy, who Sophie has not once considered could be an FBoy, is an FBoy.

He pretends he's reformed and is now also a Nice Guy but I DON'T TRUST HIM FOR A SECOND.

Abbie says there will be no elimination tonight, which I'm okay with because it means more time to watch FBoys beg for their lives.

The next morning, the Nice Guys toast to... not being d**kheads, and the FBoys are all like, 'Wow, maybe I've just realised women are people who deserve respect!' and/or 'Wow, maybe if I pretend I've realised women are people who deserve respect I can still win the money!' 

Meanwhile, the women are clearing their heads with some yoga on the beach.

It looks aesthetically pleasing but logistically, it must be a nightmare. You don't want sand in your downward dog!

They debrief with Abbie and the TL;DR is that they all have feelings for an FBoy. And a Nice Guy.

Because, obviously.

In Limbro, Abbie takes the exiled FBoys through emotionally vulnerable trust falls, where they must apologise for a past indiscretion.

The greatest one is Simon's: "I'm sorry that I made little to no impact on this show."

With that sentence, delivered in a complete monotone, he's turned it all around. Iconic! 

It's time for a game! Called Douche Tank!

They must answer questions about the women sufficiently or be dunked. Which means we're about to see a lot of wet men.

Caleb answers Ziara's star sign correctly but still gets douched because he deserves it just for, like, existing as an FBoy.

Vernon and Clay are douched for... being douches, and Justin is douched because he would look hot wet.

Boy, bye! Image: Binge.

IT'S MIXER TIME.

Caleb is complaining to Benny about how annoying Vernon is, which is true, but DAMN. We are witnessing FBoy on FBoy crime! That's cold!

He tries to convince Ziara that he is reformed and a Good Man, which I presume is the final evolution of a Nice Guy. He's really going all out and ZIARA IS INTO IT.

She still doesn't trust secret 30-something actor Cory, who apologises and asks for a clean slate.

Sophie quizzes Joshy on his FBoy status, and he also says he didn't expect to meet someone he liked! 

Then Vernon says essentially the same to Molly.

I love how everyone's defence is that they did not expect to meet women they actually respect. That's not the redemption arc they think it is!

Molly is wondering if Nick is too nice, but then they pash in front of everyone and I'M SORRY SURELY THE DUDE HAS THE WIN LOCKED IN NOW.

They're so hot???????

This all has Sean realising that he has no chance with the women whose name he cannot even get right, which is a real shame for him emotionally but also... financially.

Finally, it's elimination time.

Molly's bottom two are Ben and Sean.

Sophie's are Clay and... Clay. I love that no one on this show gives a f**k about the rules.

And Ziara selects Josh and Caleb.

Clay reckons he's leaving just as he came: as a d**khead.

Molly asks if he's learned anything, and he says he has. The dude, who is a content creator may I remind you, has learned he needs to up his social media game.

Why are men?

DO NOT FOLLOW THIS MAN. Image: Binge.

Sean starts talking about Molly hooking up with other dudes, and even if he had a point, there's no way anyone can take him seriously when he's dressed in a suit blazer with no shirt underneath.

Caleb once again recites from his redemption cue cards and it... works.

So long to Josh. It was nice getting to not know you. 

In a major plot twist, Sophie sends Clay home! And Molly says goodbye to Ben, an alleged FBoy with precisely no FBoy game.

EVEN THOUGH SEAN IS LITERALLY STANDING THERE WITH NO SHIRT UNDER HIS BLAZER.

Surely, it's only a matter of time...

Read our recap of this week's other FBoy Island Australia episode here.

Chelsea McLaughlin is Mamamia's Senior Entertainment Writer and co-host of The Spill. For more pop culture takes, recommendations and sarcasm, you can follow her on Instagram.

Read more:

• Mamamia recaps FBoy Island episode 3: This FBoy pillow fight will be etched in our brains forever.
  
• Mamamia recaps FBoy Island episode 4: Uh, sir, you can't just talk to bar staff about Kama Sutra?
• Mamamia recaps FBoy Island episode 5: Is Nuggetgate the greatest reality TV storyline of our time?
• Mamamia recaps FBoy Island episode 6: An FBoy reveals himself... prematurely.
• Mamamia recaps FBoy Island episode 8: We need Molly and Nick to ride off into the sunset together RIGHT NOW.
  

Feature image: Binge.