You met someone new, and you’re in love.
All there is, is you and them.
Exploring one another, spending hours alone taking everything in, from how they take their coffee, to the way they smell first thing in the morning – you just can’t get enough.
Now, unless you’re a teenager or coming from a monastery, it’s inevitable, the ex is gonna come up.
We all have at least one. But why when it does, do we have to feel negatively?
I guess it comes down to the story that’s told, and I understand that not all relationships end amicably. But why, as the new partner, do we take pleasure in hearing how terrible things were?
Perhaps it’s the ego, needing to be told that I’m special and nothing compares to what we have right now. Or do I just want reassurance that my new love will not be running off with an old love?
Whatever the reason, it seems to me a little backwards.
None of my exes where bad people, even the relationships that ended badly. And if you put them all in a room together, would they get along? In my case, most likely yes.
After all, they all share similar values, goals and dreams, the very things that drew me to them, and them to me, in the first place.
Top Comments
I think in any new relationship, your partner will only tell you what they want you know about why previous relationships broke down. There are three sides to every relationship ending, each partner has their side and the truth is somewhere in between.
My ex’s current wife believes every word he has said about me and can’t understand why his parents would maintain contact with me after everything I did. I still don’t know, and they don’t know, what I did that was so terrible other than to leave an abusive marriage. I never stopped him having contact with the children. I always tried to ensure that any changes to the care arrangements was about what was best for the children.