'When I left my abusive partner, I thought I was free. Then I checked my credit card balance.'

Have you ever been at the checkout knowing that you only have a $100 in the bank for your weekly groceries and the transaction was declined? You check your bank and see that the money is gone.

Have you ever been given an allowance from your own pay? 

Has your account ever been emptied via online gambling?

Have you been told you cannot get a job? Prevented from working? 

Have you ever been forced by your partner to go on Centrelink payments even though he works or is on a payment too? Knowing that if you don’t you will be assaulted and if you say anything to anyone you could be charged with fraud?

While you're here, watch these three women share their stories on financial abuse. Story continues after video.

This is what financial abuse looks like, and it happens to more women than you can imagine. Financial abuse can take on many different forms and affect anyone of any age. Abusers can be partners, family members or even carers. 

Financial abuse is one of the most manipulative forms of domestic violence, and it is usually invisible. Financial abuse is like all forms of domestic violence, where one person uses power and control over another. It often occurs when one person is excluded from any decision making or access to finances so they can’t support themselves and or families. Financial abuse is a type of coercive control, and it is often hard to prove.

There are many tactics of financial abuse which can involve victims in fraudulent activity or result in coerced debt against their will and in some cases, without their knowledge.

I was left with a huge credit card debt when I left my abusive partner. I would give him the money to pay off the credit card monthly bill at the post office. I later found out he would pay it then go and withdraw the money immediately. 

I was left with a $5000 plus interest debt that I just couldn’t get down because the interest on the card was so high; it was an uphill battle. $5000 plus debt is a lot of money when you are a single mother working part time.

I couldn’t get ahead, and I eventually made a debt agreement (also known as a Part IX debt agreement) which is a formal way of settling most debts without going bankrupt. It's an agreement between you and your creditors — that is, whoever you owe money to. A debt agreement is for people on a lower income who can't pay what they owe. And it puts a black mark on your credit for five5 years, meaning you can’t get any form of credit.

Because of my personal experience - I understand that financial abuse can be extremely hard to prove and when there are any forms of coercive control such as financial abuse there are likely to be other forms of abuse.

Side note: Whilst talking about finances isn't the most romantic topic, it's essential to every relationship. Listen to What The Finance below. Story continues after podcast.

But there are services out there that can help.

Every Australian state has legislation that allows individuals to apply for a restraining order that is designed to protect people from all forms of abuse including financial abuse. There are many Legal Centres all over Australia that can help you by advising how to get help and understand your rights.

Services like YWCA Australia can help you stay safe and support you to regain financial control. This might look like help to apply for Centrelink and receiving child support payments so you have an income, referrals to financial counsellors who can support you to manage your finances and support to find affordable housing - because when you’re spending all your income on rent it can be hard to get ahead financially. They can also help you return to the workforce or education and access childcare so you can maintain your financial independence. 

Remember, it’s never too late to build your financial independence. And while you may need help, you don’t have to do it alone.

YWCA Australia has partnered with CommBank to help raise funds to support victim-survivors of financial abuse via the Next Chapter CanGive appeal. 

Through the appeal, the bank will open CanGive, its donation platform available in the CommBank App, to allow customers the opportunity to show their support by donating vital funds to YWCA. CommBank will dollar match up to a combined total of $300,000.  

The appeal forms part of CommBank Next Chapter; the bank’s long-standing initiative to address the issue of financial abuse, perpetrated through domestic and family violence.

If you think or know you are a victim of financial abuse, there is help. Recognising there is a problem is the first step, and it’s important to know that you are not alone. If you or someone you know is affected by financial abuse you can call  1800RESPECT or The National Debt Helpline both services offer free counselling.

Feature Image: Supplied.

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