Just 4 of the worst Architectural Digest Celebrity House Tours of all time.

I adore watching rich people buy stupid things. 

More specifically, I love watching absurdly wealthy celebrities show off properties they definitely do not have any emotional ties to.

The mega mansions, the glorious brownstones, the quaint cottages. 

You name it, I've watched it, judged it and then written about it, and in my time, I have offended many.

Let people live, some will tell me.

Like your home is any better, others will say.

You're a raging b**ch, one or two (perhaps three) comments are sure to read.

I've crossed the line, I'll admit. Perhaps celebrities shouldn't be held accountable for their heinous homes or hideous interior decisions because, after all, they're only multi-millionaires who don't actually care what I have to say.

But some homes are actually deserving of both my judgement and my wrath. Sure, they haven't hurt me physically, but the emotional pain inflicted on me by looking at these monstrosities is more than I can take.

There are some seriously bad ones, but there are also ones that just don't... speak to me. I have a simple ranking where I plus or minus a point depending on how I feel towards each home.

Does this backyard look like a retreat or an abandoned jungle gym? Is this hallway too big or just right? Would I move into the master suite or set it alight? Is this kid's bedroom beautiful or do I just have baby fever?

Then I decide whether I like the art, if the shower looks like it could actually give some good water pressure, and if I could see myself taking a long, half-naked nap on the couch.

Simple, really. 

As such, I've rounded up some of the worst celebrity home tours I've seen in my time. Not all of these houses are bad per se, it's more so they just don't resonate with me personally. Probably because they are ugly.

But in all seriousness, I'm not a bad person. 

I appreciate that these homes took a lot of effort to build, design and furnish and that these celebrities have feelings. That's why I'm not coming for them personally or attacking them as people – just their houses. 

Here are four of the worst Architectural Digest Celebrity House Tours of all time, based on several factors (mostly my opinion).

Zedd.

The DJ's house tour is probably the first celebrity house tour from Architectural Digest I ever watched. And it's safe to say the 9,400 square feet ultra-modern mansion in Beverly Hills was a home I actually would have been better off not seeing.

It is, without a doubt, the type of home that has ruined architecture. 

Do I know anything about architecture? No. 

Do I have any experience in renovating, designing or, dare I say it, buying a home? Also no. 

Which is why I am such an expert today! It might be worth US$21 million with its olive tree, infinity pool and wall made of Lego, but that doesn't mean I have to appreciate it.

I actually can't critique everything, because I don't have the time or the patience, but I will say that the only thing I found mildly interesting was that no one had fallen into the two-foot concrete pond near his front door.

God. It's horrible. Don't you think? Image: AD.

It's also worth mentioning that this is the type of house my brother would buy if he won the lottery (and I don't even have a brother, but you understand my point now, right?).

Overall, I think I mostly dislike Zedd's home because the vibes are very cold, very clinical, very bland. And I'm sorry, but someone had to say it.

Watch a snippet of Zedd's celebrity AD House Tour. Post continues after video. 

David Dobrik.

Another person with too much money and not enough friends to tell them when a purchase is a bad decision? David Dobrik.

The controversial YouTuber (who was once one of the most famous men on YouTube) has actually sold the four-bedroom Los Angeles home since he first gave a tour of it in 2021 because, unfortunately, people kept trying to come into his house (hence the hammered-in glass door).

Which, in my opinion, speaks to what a s**t show this house is.

David Dobrik couldn't give a house tour with his backyard doors fully open because he'd left a nail in the doors to keep robbers out. Image: AD.

We've already established I am a hater, but I feel it is for good reason because why are adult-aged children allowed to buy multi-million dollar mansions in the most expensive parts of Los Angeles without criticism??

ALAS. I am here. To bring my criticism. In full force.

It's also another home that isn't... horrible. There are just things I hate, like the off-coloured bar cart and the custom neon wall sign that is supposed to appear as art. And the kitsch kitchen cabinets and chairs. Oh, and the rest of it too!

Young men and their toys, I guess? Image: AD.

The Kids' Choice Award was also a nice but cringy touch.

Overall, this property was considered "high-risk", according to AD, because it was in danger of sliding off the hill it sat upon, and if I'm being honest?

I WISH IT DID. 

Overall, don't rate it. It looks like it feels very... sticky.

You can watch the full house tour by David Dobrik here:

Try Guy Ned and Ariel Fulmer.

These are normal people doing normal things in their plain and normal home.

It's a Spanish-style house that has been renovated to be open and airy and not very Old Spanish-style at all anymore. In fact, all they kept were the floors.

All they kept were the floors. Allegedly. Image: AD.

Knowing that is almost as disappointing as when you learn about why Try Guy Ned is so widely hated (hint: very! messy! affair!).

I hate their in-unit laundry, but love Ariel's passion. Overall, though, I don't like it because it is too normal. Too respectable. Where is the marble kitchen countertop? The pool that overlooks all of dreary Los Angeles? The leafy-looking wallpaper made from 24k gold?

Do better, guys. 

You can watch the full house tour by Try Guy Ned and Ariel Fulmer here:

David Harbour.

I've written about David Harbour before. He is dreamy and his choice of furnishing and interior design is enviable. Actually, Harbour and his wife Lily Allen (who also doubles as an icon and singer) were what got me into the game of recapping AD Celebrity Home Tours in the first place (yes, I know. Such a feat). Their NYC Brownstone was the stuff dreams were made of.

That house was the beginning of everything for me.

And that is why I am pretty devastated rn. Because I don't want him to be on this list. Harbour doesn't deserve it, but unfortunately, his creepy little apartment does and I am starting a petition to return that haunted mansion back to whatever hellscape it came from.

Am I being dramatic? Yes. But would I live there knowing that a very powerful spirit haunts its eerie halls and dark, damp bathroom? Tbh, maybe (it's in NYC after all).

It's custom-renovated, and not labelled as an apartment but a "loft", which is a very d*ckish thing to say, no offence.

And honestly, it's really beautiful. 

There's a nice amount of light, funky art that is personal to him, a kitchen that looks exactly like the one he shares with his wife and overall, a very cooky feel that I happen to respect.

Beautiful. But eerie. Image: AD.

But then you get to the bathroom and I know that it's a bathroom but it feels very wet and damp and scary.

I'm frightened. Image: AD.

I'm not one to judge (ha), but I feel as if many souls have used this bathroom as the path to an afterlife. Like when they've passed away, they use this bathroom to transition to whatever comes after earth?

Frankly, I don't like it. And now? I don't like you either, David Harbour.

You can watch the full house tour by David Harbour here:

Feature Image: Architectural Digest.